[My Dark Vanessa] E–pub ✓ Kate Elizabeth Russell

REVIEW · GARAKAMI.CO ´ Kate Elizabeth Russell

Kate Elizabeth Russell ´ 1 FREE READ REVIEW · GARAKAMI.CO ´ Kate Elizabeth Russell FREE READ My Dark Vanessa Ent who reaches out to Vanessa and now Vanessa suddenly finds herself facing an impossible choice remain silent firm in the belief that her teenage self willingly engaged in this relationship or redefine herself and the events of her past But how can Vanessa reject her first love the man who fundamentally transformed her and has been a persistent presence in her life Is it possible that the man she loved as a teenager and who professed to worship only her may be far different from what she has always believedAlternating between Vanessa’s present and her past M. Typically when I finish a book the best case scenario is that I jot down a few notes for the future me who is desperately trying to alchemize fading away thoughts into a review These helpful and compelling insights include phrases like beautiful writing I don t like the characters At first this was hard to get into but then I enjoyed it You know The kind of bring the house down literary criticisms that have the world s finest book reviews and newspaper Sunday sections knocking at my doorBut when I finished this one I so badly needed some kind of outlet or catharsis that I sat down and typed and typed and typed I free wrote pages of thoughts and feelings until I felt a little betterMost of that is somehow even less usable than I Liked This but still Lately I ve been shooting for the goal of finishing a book per day whenever possible which is all well and good until I m suddenly trying to force myself through an incredibly dark and traumatic book in a matter of hours At one point I caught myself scoffing at this story I played the Vanessa to Vanessa the character who doesn t believe not because of some secret misogyny or doubt or cruelty but because of the story she d told herself the narrative she d created in order to better survive No man is this evil No person is this manipulative I told myself Who thinks of all these things Later in the story Vanessa meets a professor who is kind He cares because she is so smart so funny such a good student He s a Good Guy And so what if his wife doesn t come up in conversation when everything else doesI have known so many men like this that it s crushing I have had so many professors who made me feel special and smart until I realized the inappropriate tinges to their words the idea that it s not really normal to get late night emails from men who are fifteen years older and have power over you When someone tells you everything about themselves and their life is desperate to unleash the small events of their days the fact that their wife didn t come up in conversation is deliberate a choiceAnd the fact of the matter is that I know there are men who are that manipulative I don t want to believe it I want to banish that type of person as a fairytale villain because it is so much easier to live if I can believe myself an eual participant in everything that has ever happened to me And if that comes with a little self hatred so whatThis is a true story And it hurts to read And it hurts to recognize yourself in the pages even in the smallest ways For a very long time I have excused the men in my life for the ways they have hurt me even if those moments lurk behind my eyelids in the minutes I spend trying to fall asleep for years after they happened And I wish I could say no but that would be absurd That takes a journey and this book didn t take me all the way through it but maybe it helped me take the first stepThis is the story of Lolita from her perspective This is the story of Lolita returning to Dolores Haze She shouldn t feel like she has to forgive herself but she does and she doesReading Lolita was traumatic and awful for me an experience that up until now I d have undone if I could but this book helped and healed and made it worthwhile I do not recommend this book unilaterally I recommend this only to anyone who can handle it who needs it who wants it I for example should not have read this at an unsteady time in my life and I d warn anyone considering doing so away from thatBut I do recommend it That s my bottom lineAlso I just want to say Anyone who has the guts to accuse someone of plagiarism when they haven t even read the book they re assuming was stolen from themmad props I guess took some time to think about this rating and know it s at least 45 or 5 so review and final rating to come but here are all these stars for now Reading this I had to take breaks stop to watch silly videos and look at memes and play Animal Crossing between pages in an attempt to prevent the words from traveling too deep The second I finished I burst into sudden and unexpected tears gone in thirty seconds but still there still felt and surprisingI m not sure yet if I m glad I read it review rating to come me anticipated this book for monthsalso me is now scared to read it Claudette Colvin Twice Toward Justice know The Thrill Me Do Not Disturb kind of bring the house down literary criticisms that have the world s finest book reviews and newspaper Sunday sections Vildanden knocking at my doorBut when I finished this one I so badly needed some The Russo Japanese War 1904 1905 kind of outlet or catharsis that I sat down and typed and typed and typed I free wrote pages of thoughts and feelings until I felt a little betterMost of that is somehow even less usable than I Liked This but still Lately I ve been shooting for the goal of finishing a book per day whenever possible which is all well and good until I m suddenly trying to force myself through an incredibly dark and traumatic book in a matter of hours At one point I caught myself scoffing at this story I played the Vanessa to Vanessa the character who doesn t believe not because of some secret misogyny or doubt or cruelty but because of the story she d told herself the narrative she d created in order to better survive No man is this evil No person is this manipulative I told myself Who thinks of all these things Later in the story Vanessa meets a professor who is Duffy kind He cares because she is so smart so funny such a good student He s a Good Guy And so what if his wife doesn t come up in conversation when everything else doesI have Art of Deception Kate Hanson #2 known so many men like this that it s crushing I have had so many professors who made me feel special and smart until I realized the inappropriate tinges to their words the idea that it s not really normal to get late night emails from men who are fifteen years older and have power over you When someone tells you everything about themselves and their life is desperate to unleash the small events of their days the fact that their wife didn t come up in conversation is deliberate a choiceAnd the fact of the matter is that I Flight of the Clockwork Angels know there are men who are that manipulative I don t want to believe it I want to banish that type of person as a fairytale villain because it is so much easier to live if I can believe myself an eual participant in everything that has ever happened to me And if that comes with a little self hatred so whatThis is a true story And it hurts to read And it hurts to recognize yourself in the pages even in the smallest ways For a very long time I have excused the men in my life for the ways they have hurt me even if those moments lurk behind my eyelids in the minutes I spend trying to fall asleep for years after they happened And I wish I could say no but that would be absurd That takes a journey and this book didn t take me all the way through it but maybe it helped me take the first stepThis is the story of Lolita from her perspective This is the story of Lolita returning to Dolores Haze She shouldn t feel like she has to forgive herself but she does and she doesReading Lolita was traumatic and awful for me an experience that up until now I d have undone if I could but this book helped and healed and made it worthwhile I do not recommend this book unilaterally I recommend this only to anyone who can handle it who needs it who wants it I for example should not have read this at an unsteady time in my life and I d warn anyone considering doing so away from thatBut I do recommend it That s my bottom lineAlso I just want to say Anyone who has the guts to accuse someone of plagiarism when they haven t even read the book they re assuming was stolen from themmad props I guess took some time to think about this rating and Take know it s at least 45 or 5 so review and final rating to come but here are all these stars for now Reading this I had to take breaks stop to watch silly videos and look at memes and play Animal Crossing between pages in an attempt to prevent the words from traveling too deep The second I finished I burst into sudden and unexpected tears gone in thirty seconds but still there still felt and surprisingI m not sure yet if I m glad I read it review rating to come me anticipated this book for monthsalso me is now scared to read it

FREE READ My Dark VanessaMy Dark Vanessa

Kate Elizabeth Russell ´ 1 FREE READ REVIEW · GARAKAMI.CO ´ Kate Elizabeth Russell FREE READ My Dark Vanessa Y Dark Vanessa juxtaposes memory and trauma with the breathless excitement of a teenage girl discovering the power her own body can wield Thought provoking and impossible to put down this is a masterful portrayal of troubled adolescence and its repercussions that raises vital uestions about agency consent complicity and victimhood Written with the haunting intimacy of The Girls and the creeping intensity of Room My Dark Vanessa is an era defining novel that brilliantly captures and reflects the shifting cultural s transforming our relationships and society itsel. Thank you William Morrow for a finished copy This was one of the hardest books I ve ever read I hope to be able to write a full review soon but I will say that the ending might feel really heartbreaking and disappointing but that is because we live in a heartbreaking and disappointing reality There is no wrong way to heal and live through horrible things that were done to you and there is no time limit either Youtube Instagram Twitter Blog Spotify TwitchContent and Trigger Warnings rape pedophilia gaslighting sexual assault physical abuse grieving child pornography mentionacts talk of suicide suicide fatphobic comments disordered eating brief but very horrible mention at other child abuse things blood depiction and overall this is just a very dark book that will most likely make you very uncomfortable to read so please use caution

REVIEW · GARAKAMI.CO ´ Kate Elizabeth Russell

Kate Elizabeth Russell ´ 1 FREE READ REVIEW · GARAKAMI.CO ´ Kate Elizabeth Russell FREE READ My Dark Vanessa Exploring the psychological dynamics of the relationship between a precocious yet naïve teenage girl and her magnetic and manipulative teacher a brilliant all consuming read that marks the explosive debut of an extraordinary new writer2000 Bright ambitious and yearning for adulthood fifteen year old Vanessa Wye becomes entangled in an affair with Jacob Strane her magnetic and guileful forty two year old English teacher 2017 Amid the rising wave of allegations against powerful men a reckoning is coming due Strane has been accused of sexual abuse by a former stud. How do you best write about a fictional love affair between a teacher and a 15 year old student that is actually a predatory relationship There are no easy answers to that uestion but that is what happens in My Dark Vanessa which alternates between 2000 and 2017 as we see how Vanessa Wye is groomed and then raped by her teacher Jacob Strane We see the repercussions she must deal with as an adult who does not allow herself to realize that the relationship was in fact abusive We see how a child is forced to carry the responsibility the adults around her should have assumed themselves The delicate and fraught nature of adolescence is captured well This book is definitely well written and the first half is well paced There is a strong sense of place the landscape the sparseness The prose is tight and careful intimate and descriptive The protagonist Vanessa is fully realized and the author does a good job of showing Vanessa s struggle to face what she experienced Her point of view and how it shifts over time is expertly managed and feels honest You see how pernicious this kind of abuse is because it makes Vanessa doubt herself and lose herself and see herself rather than the predator as the problem There is an interesting and relentlessly claustrophobic uality to the prose You want to escape the uiet horror of Vanessa s story while also wanting to see how it all ends if she is going to be okay You want there to be a freeing moment of clean air without knowing if you will get itThere is some interesting cultural context developed through pop culture references Lolita and the evocation of MeToo I suspect we are going to see uite a few novels doing this over the next several years as writers try to distill into fiction what has been happening culturally with regard to sexual violence There were ways the people in Vanessa s life responded to her that were infuriating and inadeuate and that is all too often how these things goThe book does run too long After about 250 pages there is a thematic repetition that doesn t serve the novel well Vanessa bites her cheek constantly It s like girl is there anything left on the inside of your mouth Vanessa is fully realized but most of the other characters don t get as much depth though they should I m not crazy about the cover The real challenge I had with this book is that at times the abuse felt romanticized eroticized It gave me pause As the novel goes on there were so many rape scenes and I will always call it rape because that s what it was that it just felt somewhat gratuitous And I suspect that s kind of the point that Vanessa particularly at fifteen was torn between love and repulsion that she was shaped into someone who would see the situation as romantic while with the distance as readers we understand the situation as appalling Strane is clearly a horrible piece of shit Russell makes that crystal clear But I don t know Does she go far enoughIt all made for a very uncomfortable read and I think this should be an uncomfortable read It should make your skin crawl to bear witness to years of predation and sexual abuse I guess I don t know how I feel about that discomfort being brought about so prettily How DO you write this kind of book and get it right What does right look like These are uestions I am going to be thinking about for uite some timeAs for the discourse around this book online debates can be aggravating Believe it or not I do read the books I talk about so I can be reasonably well informed I have actually read My Dark Vanessa Wendy Ortiz s essay published in Gay Magazine does not accuse the author of plagiarism It notes the similarities between the experience Ortiz writes about in her memoir Excavation and the plot of this novel I suspect there are similarities anyone who has experienced this kind of predation might see because predators are everywhere But that is a sliver of what her essay is about What Ortiz is really talking about is who gets to tell what kinds of stories according to the whims of publishing s gatekeepers It s an essay about the frustration of encountering closed doors time and again to a story about your lived experience while those same doors open to a fictional version of a similar story and how all too often whether doors are open or closed depends on your raceethnicity It s an entirely understandable frustration and one primarily directed at the publishing industry As a side note it is not a demand for people to disclose a history of sexual violence if they write fiction about sexual violence anyone demanding that is engaging in batshittery How does this even need to be saidBack to My Dark Vanessa it s not the kind of novel that is fun to read This is not escape fiction It is dark and disturbing an ambitious debut novel and one that is going to spark a lot of discussion and discomfort The Russo Japanese War 1904 1905 kind of abuse is because it makes Vanessa doubt herself and lose herself and see herself rather than the predator as the problem There is an interesting and relentlessly claustrophobic uality to the prose You want to escape the uiet horror of Vanessa s story while also wanting to see how it all ends if she is going to be okay You want there to be a freeing moment of clean air without Duffy knowing if you will get itThere is some interesting cultural context developed through pop culture references Lolita and the evocation of MeToo I suspect we are going to see uite a few novels doing this over the next several years as writers try to distill into fiction what has been happening culturally with regard to sexual violence There were ways the people in Vanessa s life responded to her that were infuriating and inadeuate and that is all too often how these things goThe book does run too long After about 250 pages there is a thematic repetition that doesn t serve the novel well Vanessa bites her cheek constantly It s like girl is there anything left on the inside of your mouth Vanessa is fully realized but most of the other characters don t get as much depth though they should I m not crazy about the cover The real challenge I had with this book is that at times the abuse felt romanticized eroticized It gave me pause As the novel goes on there were so many rape scenes and I will always call it rape because that s what it was that it just felt somewhat gratuitous And I suspect that s Art of Deception Kate Hanson #2 kind of the point that Vanessa particularly at fifteen was torn between love and repulsion that she was shaped into someone who would see the situation as romantic while with the distance as readers we understand the situation as appalling Strane is clearly a horrible piece of shit Russell makes that crystal clear But I don t Flight of the Clockwork Angels know Does she go far enoughIt all made for a very uncomfortable read and I think this should be an uncomfortable read It should make your skin crawl to bear witness to years of predation and sexual abuse I guess I don t Take know how I feel about that discomfort being brought about so prettily How DO you write this La figlia del podestà kind of book and get it right What does right look like These are uestions I am going to be thinking about for uite some timeAs for the discourse around this book online debates can be aggravating Believe it or not I do read the books I talk about so I can be reasonably well informed I have actually read My Dark Vanessa Wendy Ortiz s essay published in Gay Magazine does not accuse the author of plagiarism It notes the similarities between the experience Ortiz writes about in her memoir Excavation and the plot of this novel I suspect there are similarities anyone who has experienced this Persuasion The Litigator's Art kind of predation might see because predators are everywhere But that is a sliver of what her essay is about What Ortiz is really talking about is who gets to tell what L'aventure ambiguë kinds of stories according to the whims of publishing s gatekeepers It s an essay about the frustration of encountering closed doors time and again to a story about your lived experience while those same doors open to a fictional version of a similar story and how all too often whether doors are open or closed depends on your raceethnicity It s an entirely understandable frustration and one primarily directed at the publishing industry As a side note it is not a demand for people to disclose a history of sexual violence if they write fiction about sexual violence anyone demanding that is engaging in batshittery How does this even need to be saidBack to My Dark Vanessa it s not the The Mangle of Practice Time Agency and Science kind of novel that is fun to read This is not escape fiction It is dark and disturbing an ambitious debut novel and one that is going to spark a lot of discussion and discomfort


10 thoughts on “[My Dark Vanessa] E–pub ✓ Kate Elizabeth Russell

  1. says: REVIEW · GARAKAMI.CO ´ Kate Elizabeth Russell [My Dark Vanessa] E–pub ✓ Kate Elizabeth Russell Kate Elizabeth Russell ´ 1 FREE READ

    FREE READ My Dark Vanessa [My Dark Vanessa] E–pub ✓ Kate Elizabeth Russell How do you best write about a fictional love affair between a teacher and a 15 year old student that is actually a predatory relatio

  2. says: FREE READ My Dark Vanessa [My Dark Vanessa] E–pub ✓ Kate Elizabeth Russell

    [My Dark Vanessa] E–pub ✓ Kate Elizabeth Russell REVIEW · GARAKAMI.CO ´ Kate Elizabeth Russell Kate Elizabeth Russell ´ 1 FREE READ I think we're very similar Nessa he whispers From the way you write I can tell you're a dark romantic like me You like dark things 3

  3. says: [My Dark Vanessa] E–pub ✓ Kate Elizabeth Russell REVIEW · GARAKAMI.CO ´ Kate Elizabeth Russell Kate Elizabeth Russell ´ 1 FREE READ

    FREE READ My Dark Vanessa Kate Elizabeth Russell ´ 1 FREE READ [My Dark Vanessa] E–pub ✓ Kate Elizabeth Russell Tragic dark repulsive and infuriating this book dives deep into the complexities of abusive relationships grooming and trauma There are complicated layers that I think the author does well in putting together the timely pop culture references to show how pervasive the culture of sexualizing young girls is; the side characters that add to the complicity of fostering that culture; the way the #MeToo movement gets co opted by journalism and

  4. says: Kate Elizabeth Russell ´ 1 FREE READ REVIEW · GARAKAMI.CO ´ Kate Elizabeth Russell [My Dark Vanessa] E–pub ✓ Kate Elizabeth Russell

    [My Dark Vanessa] E–pub ✓ Kate Elizabeth Russell REVIEW · GARAKAMI.CO ´ Kate Elizabeth Russell Kate Elizabeth Russell ´ 1 FREE READ Truth I started this book so many times and after few pages I felt suffocated my stomach churned sharp pain twisted my heart and I dropped it This happened several times and I tried to gather my wits wear my big girl’s pants and breathe in breathe out several times deeply And I started again This is most disturbing painful heart bleeding psychologically consuming complex soul crushing life changing story I

  5. says: [My Dark Vanessa] E–pub ✓ Kate Elizabeth Russell

    Kate Elizabeth Russell ´ 1 FREE READ REVIEW · GARAKAMI.CO ´ Kate Elizabeth Russell [My Dark Vanessa] E–pub ✓ Kate Elizabeth Russell Come and be worshipped come and be caressed My Dark Vanessa crimson barred my blest My Admirable butterfly Explain How could you in the gloam of Lilac Lane Have let uncouth hysterical John ShadeBlubber your face and ear and shoulder blade? From the poem Pale Fire by NabakovVanessa Wye is thirty two years old working a dead end hotel job in

  6. says: FREE READ My Dark Vanessa Kate Elizabeth Russell ´ 1 FREE READ [My Dark Vanessa] E–pub ✓ Kate Elizabeth Russell

    Kate Elizabeth Russell ´ 1 FREE READ REVIEW · GARAKAMI.CO ´ Kate Elizabeth Russell [My Dark Vanessa] E–pub ✓ Kate Elizabeth Russell Typically when I finish a book the best case scenario is that I jot down a few notes for the future me who is desperately trying to a

  7. says: REVIEW · GARAKAMI.CO ´ Kate Elizabeth Russell [My Dark Vanessa] E–pub ✓ Kate Elizabeth Russell Kate Elizabeth Russell ´ 1 FREE READ

    [My Dark Vanessa] E–pub ✓ Kate Elizabeth Russell Kate Elizabeth Russell ´ 1 FREE READ REVIEW · GARAKAMI.CO ´ Kate Elizabeth Russell Thank you William Morrow for a finished copy This was one of the hardest books I've ever read I hope to be able to write a full review soon but I will say that the ending might feel really heartbreaking and disappointing but that is because we live in a heartbreaking and disappointing reality There is no wrong way to heal and live through horrible things that were done to you and there is no time limit either

  8. says: Kate Elizabeth Russell ´ 1 FREE READ [My Dark Vanessa] E–pub ✓ Kate Elizabeth Russell

    [My Dark Vanessa] E–pub ✓ Kate Elizabeth Russell Kate Elizabeth Russell ´ 1 FREE READ My Dark Vanessa by Kate Elizabeth Russell is a 2020 William Morrow publication A powerful novel and one of the most disturbing books I’ve ever read Before reading this review be aware I made up my mind about any gray areas concerning consent this novel addresses For me there are no gray areas Fifteen year old girl forty two year old man

  9. says: FREE READ My Dark Vanessa REVIEW · GARAKAMI.CO ´ Kate Elizabeth Russell Kate Elizabeth Russell ´ 1 FREE READ

    FREE READ My Dark Vanessa REVIEW · GARAKAMI.CO ´ Kate Elizabeth Russell Kate Elizabeth Russell ´ 1 FREE READ Year 2000Vanessa 15 years of age grew up in a uiet small town in Maine on Whalesback Lake She attended Browick High School a boarding schoolcouple hours away from her home Too young to drive her mother usually drove her to school and picked her back up to come home during holiday breaks Early in the book I wondered if Vanessa’s mother had serious reasons to worry about her daughter’s basic state of well b

  10. says: FREE READ My Dark Vanessa Kate Elizabeth Russell ´ 1 FREE READ [My Dark Vanessa] E–pub ✓ Kate Elizabeth Russell

    [My Dark Vanessa] E–pub ✓ Kate Elizabeth Russell REVIEW · GARAKAMI.CO ´ Kate Elizabeth Russell this was so hard to read but so so important i highly recommend it if you're in the right head spacethe content won't be triggering to you can't wait to read from kate elizabeth russell TW sexual assault rape pedophilia grooming manipulation gaslighting victim shaming

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  • Hardcover
  • 373
  • My Dark Vanessa
  • Kate Elizabeth Russell
  • English
  • 23 April 2019
  • 9780062941503